A New Tool 2 Help U B Grateful
If you read this blog at all you know that I’m passionate about practicing gratefulness as a way to be happy. I’ve always liked the Gratefulness.org website but they launched a new site and I highly recommend that you check it out. There are lots of tools, links, resources and even a place to start a private online journal where you can record your gratefulness journey. As I’ve discussed before in this space, I have a gratitude journal that I write in every night. I list three things I’m grateful for that day and I’ve been doing it for about two years. I have to say, now that I look back on it, I really do think that it’s helped me to be a more positive person and to appreciate my life more. It’s hard to be cranky when you force yourself to sit down and take stock of three good things in your life or in life in general. Heck, sometimes I’m just grateful that I got through another day but that counts too! Check out the new Gratefulness.org site today and start to live happy!
3 Things 2 Do Today That R Guaranteed 2 Make U Happy
Being happy isn’t actually all that hard but there are some things you can do every day to guarantee it. Try these three simple things today and watch how much better you feel!
1. Choose to be Happy. Believe it or not, you can actually choose happiness but it does require some actions and reprogramming on your part. So what one thing can you do to be happier? What is your strategy for happiness? Just pick one thing. Maybe it’s choosing to be around upbeat people. Maybe it’s choosing to pay more attention to the little voice in your head that brings you down. Maybe it’s doing one thing you love every day that’s just for you. You don’t have to try to 1000 of these things but figure out what you’re doing that makes you unhappy and choose to do something different. Happiness can just happen and it’s great when it does but you can have more of it in your life when you choose to make it happen.
2. Be Thankful. You’ve heard me say it before and hopefully you’ve heard others say the same but being thankful is a surefire way to be happy. It’s really easy to do too! Just think of three things that you’re grateful for. They can be big things or little things. Your friends. Your parents. Your life. A good grade. A better grade than you thought. The way the sun feels on your face. A little kid laughing. Your friends laughing. Life is filled with tons of things to be thankful for and spending a few minutes to focus on them is an instant mood boost.
3. Forgive. Holding a grudge takes energy and creates a lot of negative energy and creates stress so you need to just let it go. The person you’re not forgiving doesn’t know or care that you’re harboring negative feelings towards them and it doesn’t actually impact them, it impacts you. How do you forgive?
Clinical psychologist Everett Worthington Jr. in his book, Five Steps to Forgiveness, created a 5-step process he calls REACH.
R: Recall the hurt. Figure out what you are or were really upset about. Figure out all the reasons but then move on to the next step.
E: Empathize and try to understand the act from the perpetrator’s point of view. I use this technique all the time and it’s helpful not only for learning to forgive, but can also keep people from getting to you. Maybe someone is having a bad day. Maybe they have an unhappy life. Maybe something really bad has happened to them. It doesn’t excuse their behavior but realizing that it’s not you helps you to let go of things.
A: Be Altruistic by recalling a time in your life when you were forgiven.
C: Commit to putting your forgiveness into words. Write an email, put it in your journal. Write it down on a piece of paper. Just get it out of your head and make it real.
H: Try to Hold on to the forgiveness. Don’t dwell on your anger, hurt, and desire for vengeance.
So there you have it. Three simple things to do every day to be happier. At least, these are the things I do. What do you do to be happy? Share it with other teens!
Why being grateful is like taking a happy pill.
I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder. ~G.K. Chesterton
Doesn’t it seem like some days there is just nothing to be grateful for? You had a fight with your friend. Your parents don’t understand you. In fact, no one understands you. You had a bad hair day. You’re bored. Niall isn’t following you on Twitter.
It’s easy to find all the reasons why we shouldn’t be happy but taking the time to think about a few things you’re grateful for, no matter how small, is like taking a happy pill. It’s an instant mood booster but don’t take my word for it.
Let me explain how being grateful makes you happy.
1. Being grateful makes you recognize all the things you take for granted. I try to be thankful for having a job, a roof over my head, running water, food in my fridge and those kind of things. So so many people in the world don’t have those things and we often don’t recognize how lucky we are to have them. Being grateful for them instantly makes you realize that life could be worse and that you actually have it pretty good.
2. Being grateful for negatives can turn them into positives. Maybe you’re unhappy that you don’t have the newest smart phone and you really want it. Be grateful you have a phone at all. Maybe you’re upset that you’re fighting with a friend. Be thankful that you have a friend. Try flipping your viewpoint of a negative by being grateful for it. All of a sudden, you feel better and realize that perhaps things are not as bad as they seem.
3. Being grateful puts life into perspective. We get so wrapped up in our own lives that we often lose perspective about what matters in life and how good we probably have it. Think about the citizens in Gaza and Israel and how they spend every waking moment worried that a bomb could drop. Think about people in Africa who are dying from Ebola. Think about people who are homeless, hungry, thirsty. Now take a look at your own life. Are your problems that bad? Be grateful that your problems are likely small compared to the things others are going through. This is not to poo poo the challenges you are facing but let’s be honest, things could probably be worse.
So stop for a minute today and be thankful for three things.
– Be thankful for one everyday thing you take for granted.
– Be thankful for a challenge or negative in your life.
– Be thankful that your problems are small ones.
Be grateful. Be happy.
The 8th Secret: Practice Gratitude
“The single greatest thing you can do to change your life today would be to start being grateful for what you have right now. And the more grateful you are, the more you get.” – Oprah
Gratitude, grateful, gratefulness, thankfulness, thankful, thanks…it doesn’t really matter how you say it, grateful people are happy people. That’s why the 8th Secret to a Happy Life is to Practice Gratitude.
From scientists to Oprah to religious leaders, everyone has recognized that the more you are thankful for all the good things in your life AND the more you share and express this thankfulness with others, the happier you will be. In fact, a recent study even showed that people who actually needed therapy but couldn’t get it improved just by keeping a gratitude journal. Perhaps even more importantly to you, there was even research conducted that showed that grateful teens are happier teens! Yes, that’s right! You can be a happier teen just by being grateful. (Oh and p.s., grateful teens also seem to get better grades if that interests you at all!)
At this point you’re hopefully saying “Yes! I’d like to be happier by being grateful!” but you don’t know where to begin.
Here are three simple steps to practicing gratitude or thankfulness in your every day life.
The Secret Handbook 4 Teens 