The Secret Handbook 4 Teens

The 2nd Secret for Teens & a Super Ego Squishing Tool

nose ring shhh

Remember Secret #1?  You are not the little voice in your head.

Well, here’s #2.

Secret #2: You do not have to listen to the little voice in  your head & there are Super Ego Squishing tools to help you do this.

Here’s Super Ego Squishing Tool #1:  Practice Awareness.

The first step in squishing your ego and silencing that little voice in your head (well, at least making it quieter) is just to become aware that it’s talking. If you are just sort of aware of it but you don’t really give it the attention it wants, it starts to quiet down.

Don’t get me wrong, this is not easy. In fact, that little voice will probably initially be thrilled that you’re paying attention to it and may even seem to talk more but when you start to really bring your awareness to it, it starts to become a little more quiet.

You’ll be amazed at how vocal that little voice is and how much you were actually listening  to it when you start to focus your awareness on it.

It’s important to note, you actually don’t want to put any energy into the little voice or really pay attention to what it’s saying – just become aware that it’s talking. Paying attention to it is basically like adding fuel to the fire. Just sort of noticing that it’s talking will make you realize how much it’s talking!

Just be aware of it. Right or wrong. Funny or sad. Mean or lighthearted. Don’t differentiate between what it’s actually saying, just notice that it’s saying something.

I know this probably sounds strange and you’re thinking that if you pay attention to it it’s just going to keep talking but trust me on this…this is just step one.

Imagine this….

Picture yourself lying on a raft in a beautiful mountain lake. The sun is warm. The breeze is just cool enough but not too chilly. Your skin feels warm and the clouds are lazily floating by in the sky. Let’s add in a beautiful butterfly flitting quietly overhead when you open your eyes a bit. Ahhhh, so peaceful. And then…


Someone throws a stone into the pond (you just know it was your annoying older/little/brother/sister/cousin/neighbor/parent) and the peace is disturbed.

So what do you do? Why you immediately jump up and swim over to where the rock went down (because you can see the ripples) and dive down to the bottom of this shallow lake. And there you see the stone starting to sink into the muck. All of a sudden the bottom of the lake is cloudy and you can barely see the surface through all the silt and muck floating around. So, you kick back to the surface and pull yourself back onto the raft but the peaceful moment is gone.

That’s basically what we do when we start listening to that little voice. We decide to investigate! We give it all the attention it’s looking for!

When we focus on that little voice – on that rock thrown into the muck – we create even more muck and we lose sight of who we really are inside.

You can handle the problems in your life the same way. If you become fixated on a certain problem in your life it seems to grow and become an even bigger problem. If you decide you’re not going to give it any attention, it starts to become less important.

So, you need to step back and just watch your problems and focus gently on that little voice. Don’t give any energy to it. Just watch it.

Eventually, you will start to realize that the little voice isn’t you. You will realize that without the little voice life is actually pretty peaceful and living can be pretty easy and fun. You will be able to focus on things like love and creating your dreams and will realize that there is SO much more to life than your little voice and your personal problems.

Of course, this all raises the question “Who am I if I’m not that little voice?” but we’ll get to that too in time.

In the meantime, practice awareness as a first step.

Start to squish your ego so your dreams can start to rise!



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